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“I walked with my friend, a Quaker, to the newsstand the other night, and he bought a paper, thanking the newsie politely. The newsie didn’t even acknowledge it.

“ ‘A sullen fellow, isn’t he?’ I commented.

“ ‘Oh, he’s that way every night,’ shrugged my friend.

“ ‘Then why do you continue to be so polite to him?’ I asked.

“ ‘Why not?’ inquired my friend. ‘Why should I let him decide how I’m going to act?’

“As I thought about this incident later, it occurred to me that the important word was ‘act.’ My friend acts toward people; most of us react toward them. He has a sense of inner balance which is lacking in most of us; he knows who he is, what he stands for, how he should behave. He refuses to return incivility for incivility, because then he would no longer be in command of his conduct” (Sydney J. Harris. “Do You Act—Or React?” Chicago Daily News).

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